And so I heard this story somewhere:

An accomplished violinist performed one of his best works at a recital, to a rousing ovation. After the performance, a woman came up to him and praised his skill, saying that she would gladly give her life to be able to play the violin like he did.

"Maam," he said, "I did."

That really struck me. If we want to be good at what we do, we've got to be willing to go all out for it. Three things have come to mind:

1) My drumming skills are getting stagnant. I need to spend more time on the set - once a month at rehearsals just doesn't cut it. And so from now on, since I'm starting work in church anyway, all evenings before CGs or meetings will be spent on the drumset.

2) My bass skills are still in their infant stages. I NEED more practice time. My pinkie is horribly weak, so I'm still using only 3 fingers on my fretting hand. THIS HAS TO CHANGE. Soon, or it's going to be a habit. And so every evening not spent on the drums shall be spent on the bass at home. I've invested in a little guitar stand, and I'm placing my bass there so I can just grab it and practice easily without the hassle of removing it from the case. Gotta do whatever it takes to encourage me to practice.

3) I want to see both TPMC and YF grow to be a dominating force in the community. A living organism empowered by the Holy Spirit of God, and not just some organisation. And God permitting, I'm devoting the next 2-3 years of my life to this.

So tommorrow is THE day. Honestly it hasn't really sunk in yet. Full time ministry. It's no longer things I do in addition to my daily work, but it's literally what I'm paid to do. I have no idea how this distinction is going to change things. Before full time ministry I'm already eating, drinking and breathing ministry. Will doing this full time drive me over the edge? It's going to be a little strange to force myself to rest on my days off and not fret so much over ministry. And then there's the people. Working with the church staff and pastors may not be quite the same as when I was a layperson. I read this joke about how ministry would be much easier if it weren't for people, and I think building up my notoriously bad relational skills will be pretty much something I need to focus on. After all "ministry is about glorifying God and edifying man".

Erhm yeah, another quote. An unavoidable consequence of having a whole truckload of books to read after Christmas.

I guess the assuring thing is that the conviction is there. This is where God wants me to be, and I think it's such a priviledge to be used in such a time as this, with TPMC embarking on a whole new chapter of our journey. I can't help but feel this sense of something big coming, and to be a part of it is just nothing short of awesome. It's so exciting that I may have to get restrained with a straight jacket or something before I rush God's plan for us as a church.

Update on my wisdom tooth: the pain never came, and I actually stopped taking the painkillers since I woke up yesterday. The only things I'm on now are the antibiotics and anti-swells, which I'm supposed to finish. Bah. And to think that my parents kept scaring me with horror stories about how painful it was when they had theirs removed. Still, there are some inconveniences. I can feel the stitching in my gum, and sometimes I'm not sure if it's the thread or some food stuck there. And I'm not supposed to brush that area for a few days so I had to settle for the mouthwash they prescribed. It's actually pretty powerful stuff - cleans about as well as normal brushing, but I think I still love the good old toothbrush. So I've settled for just brushing the right side of my mouth. I can only eat on my right side too, since I don't want food to get caught in the stitches.

One major annoyance is that I can't open my mouth too widely, or I'll risk stretching the gum area and reopening my wound. Which means that I can't really sing during my QT. Kinda wierd to be whispering songs when I'm used to just letting it all out full steam. Maybe this is God's way of encouraging me to explore alternative means of worship.

Oh and I had to throw my tooth away. It was starting to smell bad, especially when I opened the case. Sigh.

posted by NEB at 4:16 PM

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